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Allowing Ourselves to Feel and to Ask for Help

Updated: Jul 11, 2020

In last Sunday’s sermon, we talked about sitting with our suffering instead of trying to skip straight to the healing part and about not being alone with our suffering but sharing it with others and with God through prayer.


I probably should have added this caveat: this way of following the Spirit is really not easy to do. I fail most of the time. This week I have found myself trying to skip over suffering or hide the reality of it from myself and others. I found myself thinking, “I don’t really have the time to feel sad right now, I’ve got to drive somewhere or get the kids to stop fighting or do the dishes.”


One day, my daughter was sad and I made myself sit with her and not be busy. But then I still found myself wanting to push away her sadness with a new book, or some food, or by talking about something else.

We can fall into a trap of avoiding our or others’ suffering. We can also fall into a trap of really feeling our suffering but not asking for help. Both of these traps come from the fallacy of thinking we can handle it all on our own.


It is a discipline to allow ourselves to really experience difficult emotions, to be fully with others who are suffering, and to share our vulnerabilities. But when we can do that, God helps us by holding that suffering for us and helping us carry it.


Some of you all are probably much better at following the Spirit in this way tha